When They Go Low, We Stay High: Teaching Morality

In a world increasingly influenced by political strife, public incivility and rudeness, technology, globalization, and complex social dynamics, teaching children to demonstrate a strong sense of morality has never been more critical. As a retired counselor educator and mental health practitioner, I've witnessed firsthand the profound impact a well-grounded moral compass can have on children’s development and ability to navigate life's challenges. Here are some key strategies for fostering morality in children, grounded in both contemporary research and time-honored practices.

1. Modeling Moral Behavior

Children learn by observing the actions and attitudes of the adults around them. Parents/caregivers, educators, and mental health professionals must model the behaviors and values they wish to instill. This includes demonstrating honesty, kindness, empathy, and respect in everyday interactions. When children see these traits consistently exemplified, they are more likely to internalize and replicate them.

2. Encouraging Empathy and Compassion

Empathy, the ability to understand and share another person's feelings, is foundational to moral development. Activities that promote empathy—such as discussing characters in stories, volunteering as a family, or simply talking about emotions—can help children develop a deeper sense of compassion. Encouraging children to consider how their actions affect others can foster a more thoughtful and caring outlook.

3. Providing Opportunities for Moral Reasoning

It's important for children to engage in moral reasoning, where they consider the implications of their actions and the principles behind them. This can be encouraged through discussions about ethical dilemmas, both real and hypothetical. For instance, asking questions like, "What would you do if you saw someone being bullied?" or "Why is it important to tell the truth?" can help children think critically about their choices and reasons.

4. Cultivating a Sense of Responsibility

Teaching children to take responsibility for their actions is a crucial component of morality. This involves understanding the consequences of their behavior and being accountable for their decisions. That means that parents cannot give in, no matter how much it seems like children are hurting in the moment. Encouraging children to make amends when they've wronged someone and to take initiative in helping others can strengthen their sense of responsibility and integrity.

5. Promoting Inclusivity and Respect for Diversity

Teaching children to respect and value differences is vital in our diverse society. This can be done by exposing them to various cultures, religions, lifestyles, perspectives, and experiences. Discussions about fairness, equity, justice, and the importance of standing up for oneself and others against racism, bias, and discrimination can help children develop a strong sense of social justice and moral courage.

6. Supporting Moral Development through Storytelling

Stories, whether from books, films, family stories, or personal anecdotes, are powerful tools for moral education. They can illustrate moral lessons, highlight the consequences of actions, and provide examples of moral heroes. Reading stories together and discussing the moral dilemmas the characters face can help children understand and navigate their own moral choices. In particular, Black children and other youth of color need to hear stories of resistance to learn how to cope with daily racial microaggressions.

7. Creating a Supportive Environment

A supportive environment where children feel safe to express their thoughts and feelings is essential for moral development. Open communication, active listening, and positive reinforcement can encourage children to share their experiences and moral quandaries. This environment helps children feel valued and understood, fostering their moral growth.

Conclusion

Teaching children to demonstrate a strong sense of morality is an ongoing process that requires dedication, patience, and intentionality. By modeling moral behavior, encouraging empathy, providing opportunities for moral reasoning, cultivating responsibility, promoting inclusivity, utilizing storytelling, and creating a supportive environment, we can help children develop the moral foundation they need to lead meaningful, ethical lives. As adults, we guide them on this journey, ensuring they can contribute positively to their communities and the world.

In the words of the late Dr. Asa Hilliard, “Many of us do not know it, but African people have thousands of years of well-recorded deep thought and educational excellence. Teaching and the shaping of character is one of our greatest strengths. In our worldview, our children are seen as divine gifts of our creator. Our children, their families, and the social and physical environment must be nurtured together. They must be nurtured in a way that is appropriate for a spiritual people, whose aim is to build eternity.”